Let's hear it for the girls!

The newest member of the baby niece clan was born this week. Kate Michelle (all nine pounds three ounces of her) made her way into this world on December 18th. Seeing the change in dynamic of my brother's family has brought a newfound awareness to the need for balance. Quite literally as I was holding the newborn Kate AND my own toddler, while trying to get the pacifier back into the baby's mouth. I wasn't successful. Then there is trying to balance your attentions between the baby and the one who was there first, although most of the time Rachel is proud to play the role of older sister, her own baby doll in tow. There is also the sense of balancing out the family-mom, dad, two kids. And let's not forget, trying to restore inner balance following the birth of a baby. Some of us are still struggling with that one, a year and a half later. The best balancing acts are those with adequate support systems and it is vital that as friends and family we recognize this during times of transition for those we care about. I am incredibly proud of my brother and sister in law and am honored to be along on their journey through parenthood.

Congratulations to the best parents Baby Kate (and Rachel) could ask for.

Enough is Enough

I have some confessions to make. My blog posts aren't creative enough. I do not post enough. I am not patient enough with my son. My house is not clean enough or decorated enough for the holidays. The meals I cook are not exciting enough. I do not walk my dogs enough. I do not call my friends or family enough. When they call me, I do not call them back quick enough. I do not practice yoga enough. I do not meditate near enough. I do not contribute enough- to my relationships, my household, our finances. I do not play with my son enough. I do not give in enough. I do not sleep enough. I do not read enough or journal enough.

Enough. Really, enough already.

Who is setting these expectations? Although, I suspect I am not drowning alone in my sea of inadequacies, I am pretty sure they are self imposed. Why is it we are always striving for something so far out of reach? Why is "what is" never good enough? My husband has this thing he says when things don't necessarily go as planned- "it is what it is". I typically get really angry when he says this- things should be different! I am fairly certain he is not coming from a place of zen acceptance (or maybe he is and I am short changing him as well) but he is right. Once we can acknowledge our circumstances for what they are we can stop spending so much time agonizing over why they should be different, especially in matters of self acceptance.

I am certainly not suggesting that we close ourselves off to opportunities for growth. In fact, I believe that acceptance lends itself to growth because it allows us to be truly present and aware of who we are at our cores. But spending time worrying about "not being enough" is really just ruminating over the past and the only power we have over the past is the ability it has to impact our present . Instead of thinking "I always yell at my son" rephrase it to "I have yelled at my son... in the past". This gives us the power to make a change if we feel it is appropriate, instead of defining the future by choices we have previously made. How about "it was what it was"?

I am off to practice what I preach. I don't do that enough.