The Efficiency of Intention

Here is a peek at what you can accomplish in three hours:
Drop son off at morning care program, have brief conversation with brother about his upcoming procedure, drop off books at one library, pick up books on hold at another, head home to make muffins only to learn a muffin pan is missing, call grandma for muffin pan, go pick it up, have brief conversation about pros/cons of circumcision (i know, weird), come home and make muffins, fold and put away load of laundry, post listing for upcoming garage sale, make signs for upcoming garage sale, check and respond to email, make basket of muffins and card for friend who recently had baby, and off to pick up son I go. On the way, I thought about all of the things I had gotten done and I felt proud of my accomplishments. But then I realized, I didn't enjoy any of it. I was a bundle of frenetic energy whose focus was on being productive, efficient with my time but with no intention or awareness.

In my former life, I was a community social worker and productivity was the name of the game. I prided myself on my sense of efficiency and my ability to multi-task. I was respected by my colleagues and supervisors and often a model of how to do the job well. That same skill set has got me in trouble many times since becoming a mother. I often get frustrated trying to hold myself to that same standard, refusing to surrender to what is happening in the moment or acknowledge that I am not the only one with an agenda. My son has an agenda too, and my lack of awareness or respect for that explodes into pieces of a lesson I cannot seem to learn. Identifying my strengths in this new role has been difficult for me, but perhaps because I keep ignoring them, comparing myself to that same standard which no longer exists or is even necessary or relevant.

In yoga, we are told to practice with intention, to build each pose with awareness and respect for our body and our minds. Most times the intention is to unify the two, creating balance within ourselves. The same could(should) be said about any task, complete it with awareness and the rewards are so much more prevalent. Each step of a blueberry muffin recipe is such an opportunity; the ingredients melding together to create a small piece of deliciousness to share and enjoy.

Savor the moments.
Bon appetit.